Monday, February 28, 2011

Mondays are my favorite day

Tuesdays are okay.


Wednesdays are too.


Thursdays are my errand day and are nice because Grams keeps the kids so I can do my running around solo.   I'm a fan of solo. 


Who doesn't love Friday?


Saturdays are sweet.  When they're lazy, anyway.


And Sundays are usually restful and nice. 


But Mondays are my favorite!


And you're probably going to think I'm awful when I tell you why too!  


Trevy doesn't have preschool on Mondays.  He's in a Tuesday - Friday half day program.  Which means he's at home all day on Mondays.  Before you start thinking how sweet it is that Trevy's at home day is my favorite, let me assure you.  That is not why!  And you're going to think I'm a terrible mom when I tell you why.  Or at least, I'll feel like a terrible mom.  Because Mommy Guilt finds me an easy target.  Also.  When I say things like I'm about to say I'll typically hear from at least once concerned friend who is worried I might be fighting off Depression.  I like to think of it more as living honestly.   


I love Mondays because Trevy spends the entire day with Grams!


See, somewhere over the past few months Mondays have become Trevy's Grams Day.  Jonathan drops him off at the crack of dawn.  Because that's when he heads to work.  Grams' house is on the way to his work and she's an early bird.  So it works.  She and Trevy are very close.  And she's just as in tune to his seizures and the side effects he's challenged with as a result of fighting the Seizure Monster...as I am.  Which means I never ever have to worry about him. Do you know how nice it is to have a whole day Trevy-worry free?  Did I mention that lately she's been keeping him all the way through to his bed time?!  It's like a breath of fresh air after being under water far too long for your burning lungs.  That's what.  Sure, I get a much needed break from him when he's to school.  But he's never far from my thoughts.  Mondays are different.  I can clean the house and not wonder if the sirens in the distance are heading to his school.  For him.  I can fold laundry and not wonder if he'd missed any of his therapies today.  Or if Miss.OT is still not seeing how his right arm is hanging dead-like by his side again.  Because I know that Grams sees it.  I don't have to worry that he's not being challenged to use his words.  And both legs equally.  Because we're totally completely unequivocally on the same Trevy Page.  He's not a pay check to her.  He's not a project.  We don't have to write in detail on legal documents what he needs to thrive.  He's her grandson.  And she loves him more fully than any teacher or therapist ever could.  Which is not to say that his therapists and teachers don't love him.  Or aren't important.  They are.  Some more than others.  Because I give extra points to those that are on the same Trevy Page as me. But still... it's not the same.  Grams is filled with the same love that drove me to pursue radical brain surgery to rescue him.  It takes a special sort of love to willingly walk to the brink of death.  To spend hours pouring over options and interventions. She's connected with him in the same way that gave me eyes to see the minutest of eye rolls when his Infantile Spasms began boiling to the top again.   There are only two people (other than family) in Trevy's life that I have full confidence never miss a seizure.  Which is why I'm never fully comfy when he's at school.  But with Grams it's different.  She notices everything.  Everysubtlething. Grams has completely dedicated her basement (and now her office too!) to Trevy's developmental progress.  Every toy has been chosen for it's therapeutic benefits.  Little tables and magnetic boards filled with shapes and letters are her decor of choice.  She calls me to share any exciting new thing he's accomplished.  Or when he's just not himself.  Or sometimes she doesn't call me at all.  Suddenly I'll notice the clock.  And how late it is.  But be amazed that it's been hours since I thought about him.  Or wondered what he's doing.  Because I know he's safe.  And loved.  And being saturated with therapy of a different kind.   
          


And it feels wonderful to have a day completely Trevy free!


Yep.  Mondays are definitely my favorite day!            

9 comments:

Sophie's Story by Elaine said...

I am so completely jealous...in a good way. I am happy for you. You need it. It's wonderful for all involved. By the way, I HATE Mondays. Fridays are my favorite. Because it means I made it through the week and the countdown to nonstop dual parenting is on its way.

happy's mommy said...

I am SO blessed. It's crazy how my life has shifted from what I thought it would be. I thought I'd be spending my life in Africa. My mom had accepted that she'd see her grandkids once every couple years.

And now. She's raising them part-time!

I keep telling my mom she should write a blog about our life. That she could inspire other grandparents.

You're gonna think I'm such a lazy spoiled bum. But I love Fridays for the same reason. And that's even WITH my mom's help! Clearly, you're growing into a MUCH stronger mommy than me!

...d

Sophie's Story by Elaine said...

By the way, when I get a break...a real break...I feel like I come back as a better parent. Refreshed and ready to take on the challenge. And to have it be part of your weekly routine...to know that it is coming...well it just gives you hope that you can make it through another week ;)

And, yes, I know that you still have Toby and Bri (when she's not in school) but isn't it amazing how much difference one less child can make on your stress level?!?! And to have that one-on-one time with Toby...that's priceless too!

Sophie's Story by Elaine said...

Oh, I think you are going to think I am a lazy spoiled bum because my MIL has...for the most part...moved in with us for the time being. With having all 3 kids isolated during this whole steriod thing, she realized that I would lose my mind otherwise. She still has a full-time job but on most days she usually gets here around 3pm. And with Brandon not getting home before 7pm lately...well...I'm still sane...I think ;)

By the way, Sophie had her last steriod dose yesterday and I'm sending her back to school on March 14th. Let the countdown begin!!!

blogzilly said...

Mondays are my favorite day as well, but I have to admit...TOTALLY selfishly...it's because Bennett and Carter are both back to their respective schools. And weekends with no help at all from any Home Health Aide of any kind or anybody else is a bit...draining.

Do I love the boys? More than anything. I'd take multiple bullets for each of them, and not just in the meaty parts.

But as quiet descends upon the house for the first time since Friday at 5:00 PM? I have to admit...I savor it like a glass of ice cold lemonade after a hot day of mowing the lawn.

Anonymous said...

I have to admit to being jealous too.
There is only 1 other person I can truly say I can trust with H and that's his Dad.
Who is away with work lots or back here where I want him to be, but rarely gets/manage to take H away from me for any significant amount of time.

And that is with H being seizure-free. A full real proper day off even every month would be bliss.

(and yes I'm having another baby, mad? me?!!)

kt x

Kristen said...

I totally get it (in a different way) and am so happy you have that day!! My favorite days are Monday, Thursday and Friday. Both older kids are in school/at kindercamp all day. I get a break from Type 1 diabetes and Autism. Someone else has to count carbs and worry about Kailyn's blood sugar numbers. Lows, highs and ketones. If she passes out from a low, they have to give the glucagon shot. They also don't have to deal with her mood swings like I do when her numbers are all over the place because she does not act like that at school. Yes, they call me to inform me when things are out of whack, but they deal with it. Enjoy your Mondays!! It makes you a better MOM!! Now I just need to find Type 1 Diabetes friendly summer camps :)

Holli said...

Grams sounds like our Nana. Besides Chad, she is the ONLY one I can leave him with without worrying about him. She's starting an Austin-friendly room of her own now too. I cannot wait for that to be finished! lol

As much as I love the fact that I can leave him with her, she's also 100% on the same page with me in terms of Austin's treatment/goals too. She notices EVERYTHING and researches EVERYTHING! So, I get it. I know how important that is to have someone like Grams because I have one too. ;) They're like a breathe of fresh air. And we need those.

Mrs. M said...

Yay for you!!!
Yay for Grams!!!
What a sweet day for all three of you. Those are precious moments for each of you for very different reasons.
I'm going to put my order in for a Grams day like yours!;)