momentary panic

I have a bout of momentary panic daily.

Because Trevy is very mobile...

Because Trevy is very unaware of danger...

Because Trevy still puts every.single.thing into his mouth...

Because Trevy requires 100% supervision 100% of the time...

Because daily there will be a moment when I let my gaurd down and do something crazy like...

Pee. With the door closed.

Make a milk. A snack.

Read an email.

Get dressed?

Something that requires a fraction of my attention focused elsewhere.

And in that moment anything can happen. And has happened!

(Remember the time he escaped? Or fell down the stairs?)

So this morning as I was preparing for a trip to the zoo I took my eyes off him for a moment. And in that moment he vanished. I had no idea where he was. No idea.

I began frantically calling his name.

No answer. Not entirely surprising as he's non-verbal(ish). But I was hoping for a head popping out of hiding or something.

I began frantically making sure all the windows (we were upstairs) were too low to fall from.


I checked all the doors. Under all the beds. In the way way back of the master closet.

No Trevy.

No Trevy.

No Trevy.

At the peak of my panic attack. As my mind whizzed through all the terrible things that he could have done to himself (how can I call myself a good mother with all those choking hazards around!) or could be happening to him no fault his own (please God don't let today be the day he has an unstoppable tonic clonic!). As my hands started sweating profusely. And my heart thumping out of my chest.

Suddenly there he was.

Right in front of me.

Tumbled out of who knows where. Thank you, Jesus...I breathed upon seeing his binkie still plugging the taste tester.

With tears streaming I gathered him up in a bear hug while my momentary panic subsided. He just smiled behind the binkie. Clueless that he'd nearly given me a heart attack. Just happy to be smothered in love. Just happy being Trevy.

While his mommy was busy desperately hoping that someday these momentary panic moments will be fond memories to someday laugh together about...


Anonymous said...

I am glad you found him or he found you?:o)..

happy's mommy said...

Oooooh...it was totally HIM finding me!

It's laugh or cry...or BOTH...right?!

Not every day has such a big freak fest. But every day something happens to make my heart pound. Life with IS kids...

I really should be bitter that I'm not thinner!


Anonymous said...

Not to discount your emotional turmoil and joy, or anything else...

You know how there are gates and locks in a canal? Serial gating or doors - possible? For at least part of your home? You know me, trying to be practical and solve the problem. Just trying. Barbara

Colby said...

Well, girl...It IS Friday the 13th, ya know....

Love your post...as usual...And I could FEEL that panic....Though i've neve had to go searching for my boy!

Here's one for ya...Reading this post makes me thankful Colby can't walk!!! How craaaaazy is that?????? (Well, KIND of thanful....LOL!)


happy's mommy said...

B...Oh we have gates. Gates EVERYWHERE. Of course every now and then someone will forget to latch one. Upstairs is fairly small. Landing with three rooms immediately off and a half door at the top of the stairs. It's just impossible to keep it entirely safe for him. Bristel is five...and loves Littlest Petshop toys. Trevy does too. I find him chomping on them often. :) I do a and enforce the rule if I find small objects in Trevy's mouth they get thrown out. The trouble is...he's getting more and more capable of finding things. Toys that used to stay hidden in dresser drawers...have been found. And he REMEMBERS where he found them! Ahhhhhh! He likes outlets. Pushes every button he can find. If anything is accidentally left out...he's like a magnet drawn right to it! Not every day is as panicky as yesterday. But every day requires 100% attention every waking moment. All that to say...we have things in place...it's just hard to stay ahead of him!

Cyndi...you always make me smile!


Anonymous said...

So glad he reappeared, and in one piece.

Henry can spot an open gate or door a mile off, and moves like lightning then too!

Regularly find him trying out new bad things - current fave is anything to do with toilets (nice), plus popping any of Tom's small toys in his mouth (handy).

He does have a 'happy' noise that often gives me a hint i should check what he's up to, lol!

kt x

happy's mommy said...

kt...your "He does have a 'happy' noise that often gives me a hint i should check what he's up to" line made me LAUUUUGH! SO cute! Trevy has a 'naughty' silence. You know he's up to no good when he's TOO quiet. It's especially funny when you walk in on him being 'naughty' and as soon as he sees you books it in the other direction! He does make me laugh!